“Better to be strong,’ he said, ‘if you can’t be strong, be clever and make peace with someone who’s strong. But always better to be strong yourself.”
― Barack Obama, Dreams from My Father
This one’s for you, my friend. Because I know you needed a little pick-me-up. You know who you are.
Hello and welcome! If you’re reading this, it means you either found me randomly on cyberspace while browsing through boring WordPress articles or you probably already know who I am since I have the link to the blog on my Instagram/Twitter accounts. Y’all stalkers.
I’m kidding. I’ve been in a witty, good mood lately and I thought about sharing a few insights with you. Ones that have really helped me get through difficult experiences or just situations with a few too many obstacles. As I always write on previous posts, the purpose of my thoughts being written onto this blog narrow down to one thing: to learn. I learn substantially by penning them down. I’m sure more than one of you can relate and learn with me as well.
I’ve always been the kind of person to never, ever, EVER, rely on anyone to get things done. Maybe because up on to a certain point, I didn’t feel the need to do so, After all, and quoting Nietzsche, “we should learn to respect the enemy within our friend”. So I abided by that rule. Relying on yourself isn’t a bad thing, it is actually tremendously important. Only you know exactly and deep inside what is good for you, but hopping through life thinking ourselves invincible is just plain stupid.
There’s no particular lesson or anecdote here for me to share on my experiences relying on people; only the conclusion to a series of events that have helped me realize that we always need someone to lean on to. For me in particular, it has been one of the hardest things to do. But as I’m gliding through my twenties ever so easily (now that’s a huge lie), I’ve been discovering a few things about relying on the right people when needed. This doesn’t mean dependability whatsoever. The “situation” and the “help” should both be in sync.
Today’s world is more competitive than it’s ever been, not only at work, but in everyday life, and many of us don’t understand that the only way to grow is to help one another grow. The animal within us and old school thinking constantly try to break in, tempting us to step on any other “competition” on our journey to success.
Better to be strong yourself
As I said, I cannot stress enough on how important this is. We all have a ―however you want to call it― sixth sense within us: the sense of self. The one that, if we dig deep into ourselves, tells us exactly what we need to do. Some of us have a hard time getting in touch with it and some of us find it easily. One thing that helped me finally listen to it was talking to myself. As crazy as it sounds. Words came out of me as if it was someone else talking to me. I knew exactly what I needed and the only time it failed was when I did not listen to it; to me. This eventually led me to write. Writing helps me prioritize and organize.
…if you can’t be strong, be clever and make peace with someone who’s strong
This one’s the tricky part. Our survival instincts sometimes lets us on the loose to eliminate everything potentially dangerous within our paths. I, too, have been known to act this way. But I’ve met people along the way that have changed my mentality to a complete 180 degrees. For example, in regards to work. The other day I read somewhere that you don’t have to pick a job, you have to pick a boss. I have been extremely lucky to have had the most amazing bosses through the few years I’ve been in the work force. I’ve also had the complete different side of the spectrum bosses. I’ve had co-workers that taught me how to lend a hand, and others that taught me they will never grow out of their greedy, small mentality. And I’ve met people who have a passion for watching the world burn. They too, at some point burn along with their victims.
We need to walk through life seeing with our minds, not our eyes. Our sense of self is a key player in finding the people who have it in them to be relied on. It is so important to detect them and make peace with them. Everyone we encounter is a teacher, but not everyone is a rock. The one’s with “reliable rock” properties can be the next step built in the air towards our way up. Or they can be a great comfort when we break down.
The key of all this is balance. It is better to be strong, but if you can’t, rely on someone who is strong. One day you’ll dance for me, one day I’ll dance for you. Keep your eyes wide open. Open wide.
Till next time,
MM
Marie Momentum 